ehowton: (Default)
My alarm went off. As my head was on the pillow, I saw my alarm clock sideways, and as my glasses were sitting on the end table, I squinted. I couldn't make out the time. Something was blocking the display. I reach my hand out to move the obstruction. There wasn't one. I've only had five hours of sleep. Trying...to...think. I sit up, put on my glasses and stare at the clock. Sure enough, "J:20" Crap alarm clock. Cost me $50 and took me half an hour to pick out a year ago. Poor Tony, suffering next to me while I sweated over the features. Once, we went to Fry's to pick out cases for our computers. He chose his in 14-seconds. I took nearly a full hour.

What do you mean, Doc? All the best stuff is made in Japan.

Stayed up late working on my new avatar last night. It's some of my best work to date, if for no other reason than the lack of good source material, and what I was actually able to accomplish with what I had. The subject was similar in color to the background making for a near impossible extraction, so I had to roll with it. First off I had to rotate the image 45-degrees just to get it visible enough at the size limitations. Then, using the color scheme, rendered some clouds, clone-stamped the other areas by hand, brought out the foreground with a spotlight effect and added a lens flare. Fantastic!

Unbelievable.

Reprising my role as Grill Master this evening, my first act will be to grill salmon for dinner! I can't wait to light that cigar, stroll out on my deck, and fire up that grill. Of course they're now linking grilling to cancer. Carcinogens from dripping fat hitting the flash plates and the char produced from ultra-seared meat. Nice. That's one tip I didn't need to hear about SomeBritInMass!

Marty, you're not thinking fourth dimensionally!

So yesterday, even though the IS department is not responsible for meeting setup, I get a call from one our Directors. It was her meeting, and in it she had her boss. So I go up there. The projector was setup in the middle of a box of tables strung with interconnected hubs and power strips. "What can I help you with?" I ask the Director. "BIGGER!" yells her boss, throwing his hands into the air. "Can we increase the screen size?" she asks me. "BIGGER!" he yells again. I try to NOT give him my tone it down, asshole I am so done with your mouth looks. "BIGGER!" he yells again as I carefully roll the cart containing the projector on it. I reach the limit of the cabling. "BIGGER!" he yells yet again. "I WANT THE PICTURE ACROSS THE ENTIRE SCREEN." He grabs the cart, and pulls it back further, dragging half the powerstrips and hubs to the floor. I know I visibly sighed. There was nothing more I could do but leave. I shit you not, I heard one last time, "BIGGER!"

Yeah, I know, I got a real problem with that.

Later, on http://ehowton.livejournal.com:

(4:25:12 PM) drax0r: I'm writing a post about morning jazz
(4:30:53 PM) EricHowton: I'm going to write about the proposed legislation curbing bandwidth access and speeds from the telecommunications lobbyists because they feel they bear the brunt of the burden providing access which allows entrepreneurial companies to get rich off their lines without them getting a slice of the pie.

AND:

(4:45:03 PM) EricHowton: I don't know which is worse.
(4:45:12 PM) drax0r: ?
(4:45:13 PM) EricHowton: Living with my wife who, every single day reminds me I haven't submitted an expense report for six months, or...
(4:46:18 PM) drax0r: That. That's worse. There's nothing you could say now that would make me think there's something worse than that.
(4:46:54 PM) EricHowton: Submitting a 6-month old expense report to my boss.
(4:47:30 PM) drax0r: Wow.
(4:47:45 PM) drax0r: That's a tough one.



Date/Time: 2006-05-18 22:15 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] jesskd26.livejournal.com
I feel your alarm clock pain, E. I once spent about 50 bucks on an alarm clock. It had fm radio, a CD player, nature sounds, woke you up to simulated sunlight, and even had an aromatherapy feature.

It stopped working after a month.

Have fun with the grilling! Im still looking for a grill master for when I move into my own place. Unfortunatley, they don't have those listed in the yellow pages. Grilled salmon sounds absolutley splendid.
Date/Time: 2006-05-18 22:55 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
I once spent about 50 bucks on an alarm clock.

I got mine for $8 at target. Clearance isle.


Date/Time: 2006-05-19 00:22 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Image
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 00:54 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
You are so awesome.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 03:11 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
You are too, dude. Thanks.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 01:55 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] jesskd26.livejournal.com
Sheesh....you can get a lamp for that much
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:03 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
Yeah, but does the lamp play CDs and have nature sounds?
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:15 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
My favorite is the under $20 ones where each of the selected nature 'sounds' return different combinations of...well what sounds like static. Very annoying. They should use high-bitrate mp3's in a loop on a flash chip or something.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:19 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
I do really likes the ones with a little waterfall that plays nature sounds.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:21 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
I'd need to urinate in the middle of the night if I had a waterfall adjacent my head. Either that or I'd get my hand wet in my sleep.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:27 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
Yes, that is always a concern.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:53 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Image
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:38 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
That sounds like a page right out of the American Beauty script.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:57 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Just because you re-create the Kevin Spacey shower scene every morning, don't go bringing that shit on my blog.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 20:01 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
I was referring to the scene where he got caught masturbating in bed by his wife, not the shower scene.

Ass.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:37 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
I'm starting to like you more and more...especially your shopping habbits. Perhaps we should go some time.

oh and Once, we went to Fry's to pick out cases for our computers. He chose his in 14-seconds. I took nearly a full hour.
I'm assumming this wasn't a mod case, right?
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:41 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
It ended up being very similar to yours, yes. But I did not go out in search of buying a goofy l33t c4s3 d00d! It simply ended up that way. Furthermore, anything purchased COTS like that, I don't consider a 'mod.' Only if you've done the modifications yourself, and I don't mean you added a neon fan, either.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:44 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
Ass. My case rocks harder then your's does.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:48 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
That was a joke. I wouldn't buy an $8 alarm clock. I would buy the most expensive one with minimal thought, assuming that at the price I paid, it would be halfway decent.

Do not go shopping with me.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:58 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
ditto. I have a bad habbit of doing this too. In fact, I joke with my co-workers that I'm used to overpaying.
Date/Time: 2008-01-10 22:18 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Aisle. It's not surrounded by water. I am a rock, I am an island. And a rock feels no pain; And an island never cries.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 03:10 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Don't move without one!
Date/Time: 2006-05-18 22:54 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] drax0r.livejournal.com
Sure enough, "J:20"

Shit! Late again.


He chose his [computer case] in 14-seconds.

Antec? Check. Power supply? 420 Watts. Does it look retarded? No, its sexy.
Buy it.


the lack of good source material

That's always my biggest problem with avatar creation. I know exactly what I want, but that's often so hard to find.


my first act will be to grill salmon for dinner

I can be there in 7 hours. Save some for me.


"BIGGER!"

Clueless executives are the worst kind of customers. They're impulsive, demanding, and can fire you for pointing that out.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 02:22 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
It was tilapia.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 13:02 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] galinda822.livejournal.com
And it was delicious!!! Thank you!
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 14:08 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Aye.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:39 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
the only thing that's worse then a clueless excecutive is a clueless business executive who's trying to tell the programmer how to write the damned code.

Asses.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 00:04 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] oxy-irony.livejournal.com
Oy, vey. "BIGGER!"

Sorry, I know it's no fun to be horribly frustrated...

I also feel your pain about the alarm clock- I'm on my third one in the last two years, now. It seems to be working for me well, but let's just hope it doesn't go down the same road the other two did...
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 03:12 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Whatever is one to do?
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 03:27 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] oxy-irony.livejournal.com
Got a hammer handy?
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 03:17 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] professortom.livejournal.com
I don't get it.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 05:20 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] apostolic4god.livejournal.com
Is that all you guys have him do ... say 'I don't get it'?!
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 14:07 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Here latey, yeah. It makes me giggle. Check out some of my earlier posts for his more verbose replies. They're even funnier.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:41 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
Howton, you know we don't care to hear about your giggle stick.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:41 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
Thanks for sticking up for me. You rock harder.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:56 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
She was laughing as she said it, Tom.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 20:02 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
Ass.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 14:58 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] wardlejew.livejournal.com
My alarm costed nothing. It is one of those atomic clocks that sets itself everynight at midnight. Runs on batteries, but plays no music. When you click the side button, it does that cool light green light up thing. Handy in the middle of the night when trying to avoid all the wife's booby traps on the floor. One thing they can't seem to figure out is the time change thing. My clock is now on CT, though I live in MT. One of these days I'm going to end up being early for work.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 15:23 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Yeah, I went to bed last night at J:30 and awoke at J:10.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:42 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
did you try converting to hex?
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:54 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
'J' is not a hex character, Einstein.
Date/Time: 2006-05-19 19:58 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
oh God! How could I be such a dumbass?!?!?!?!?
Date/Time: 2008-05-19 23:59 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] ehowton.livejournal.com
Let me count the ways...
Date/Time: 2008-05-20 00:14 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
I'd hate you if I didn't like you.
Date/Time: 2008-05-19 23:48 (UTC)Posted by: [identity profile] schpydurx.livejournal.com
FAIL!

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