The Empirical Manifesto

Work hours notwithstanding, things have been going swimmingly for a rather lengthy period of time - which is awesome - but the universe survives on balance, therefore so must I. Shot a wedding this weekend and the tripod broke. I was able to create a temporary fix with a coffee stir stick and a glut of painters tape. Then the battery grip on the Canon 6D stopped working. And finally the Fuji X-T4 stopped shooting in vertical mode (also possibly grip related). Thankfully I brought three bodies, and the little white Canon SL1 came through.

For those that don't know, our house is on the edge of town touching the golf course. We recently bought a corner lot off Main Street which required mowing last week. My first weekend off in three weeks was this past weekend and I got that mowed today with the help of some fresh gas in a dusty mower I haven't fired up in four years; yay!å

Then the 8TB drive in my desktop uninitialized. But was fine again after the third reboot. I started copying my 333GB photo directory onto the NAS when the computer blue-screened and got caught in a reboot loop causing the automated recovery to suggest a reload of the O/S...which it wants to do over WiFi instead of my hardwired gig network for reasons unknown.

Really just want to crawl into bed and not think about what horrors await me tomorrow.

I've been working full-time remote since 2012 so my perspective on the recent, Return to Office debate may differ slightly than those newly choosing sides in what has seemingly devolved into the classic, "us versus them" mentality. As usual, both sides don't seem to be working with a full set of rational, nuanced arguments, rather the tried-and-true appeal to emotion which supports their conclusion. But that could be just me.

Most will acknowledge a "one size fits all" policy isn't the saving throw its meant to be, but I wonder how many really consider the numerous, intricate parts which compose the integrated working ecosystem. I usually focus on personality types as one of the strongest indicators of how to craft an efficient landscape. Those in other positions of responsibility may place their focus elsewhere - which is absolutely necessary, unless it excludes any number of other disparate, moving pieces required to make it work. Back in the heyday of the DotCom boom, companies were using their newfound influx of cash for psychology-based training sessions meant to improve business-growing client relationships - many of which revolved around Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). MBTI assisted Corporate in helping us identify our unique personality types along with telltale signs of those with whom we interact - and more importantly how to communicate between the two in hopes of improving client-facing interactions. The DotCom boom ended, we started seeing our own internal business units as customers, yet we've lost those lessons along the way.

Intimate is not a word many suggest in describing the professional workplace, but given healthy corporate environments propose and encourage the majority of its underpinnings through published Mission Statements and Values, perhaps it's time. Intimacy is composed of dialog, transparency, vulnerability, and reciprocity; things we celebrate in a diverse workplace in order to increase efficiency, success, and ultimately the bottom-line. Breaking from the connotation of word, many of the most intimate relationships we have can be with our colleagues, co-workers, and other departments in a synergistic push for excellence. By better understanding how individual personality types fit specific needs, we can facilitate smoother interactions for a more streamlined deliverable.

I wouldn't be surprised to discover how many on my small team probably fall somewhere on the neurodivergent spectrum (myself included), which is no doubt partly responsible for our successful working paradigm. Despite the fact we've all been working remote for a decade, the pandemic game us the tools to solidify our routine (something else at which the neurodivergent can excel). I host a remote session every morning for the duration of our day where we effortlessly collaborate, innovate, troubleshoot, decompress, discuss, and brainstorm innumerous issues which arise. We drop off for individual meetings and add others to the call for holistic engagement when needed. We train together, celebrate together, and grieve together, but in that experience, we are stronger together. We play to each other's strengths and compensate for each other's weaknesses; the intimacy within our group, so to speak, helps us overcome the otherwise insurmountable. We are stronger as a remote team than we ever were onsite.

TIL "refractory period" is under no circumstance denotatively synonymous with "cool down" or "rest time" and should NOT be used in a corporate meeting.

So I thought it would be fun and easy to simultaneously de-register VMs from one datastore path and register them on the identical datastore but through a private GB interface while also exporting an ancient WinXP VM require for iDRAC from some random volume on one computer to my VM volume on another computer utilizing two different hypervisors (both of which can hypothteically read *.ova) and deleting unused zvols from FreeNAS while copying TBs of data from external drives to UNRAID while also attending to phone calls and answering emails today. You know what? It wasn't.

It must've been around December - the time of year surrounding personnel atrophy due to pending holidays, when my team lead suggested I use the rare slowdown to look into building a locally-cached software repository to upgrade our aging systems by bypassing WAN cloud servers to greatly speed migration and reduce outage duration. It was a rousing success. Wasn't long of course until someone asked, "What if..?"

I don't remember the exact question, but its nature is ever-present in the tangible viscosity of production operations and almost always surrounds some aspect of increased productivity, greater uptime, diminishing outages, or the verbalization of any number of vague nuisances which could eventually lead to the kind of re-framing which reverses that elusive malaise which occasionally clouds inspiration. Pattern-recognition reveals I rarely need further prodding.

As a global corporate entity we have a robust operating arena replete with sandboxes, quality-assurance boxes, development servers, and of course production. What we lack however, is a lab. Surely it could be argued that such a rich development infrastructure negates its necessity, especially given the diverse talent our highly-integrated professionals demonstrate daily in breathtaking concerts of mutually-supportive teamwork. If diversity is our strength, encouraging the intrinsic motivation of the individual with the freedom of experimentation - and failure - absolutely has the potential to synthesize collaborative innovation. It is one of the reasons I actively choose to continue my position; supportive management which fosters this unique culture.

To better answer the, "What if..." question, I procured a small Enterprise-level server and installed a hypervisor along with my own locally-cached repository. As the list of virtual machines grew, so did my need for DNS, and storage. I procured another server and built an open-source NAS. Then added SAN emulation and installed some fiber-optic network interface cards to more closely replicate our boot-from-SAN environment. As these things often happen, at some point I realized losing everything would be quite devastating, so one more server and an open-source Enterprise backup solution. This required another tier of storage, one geared more toward volume and retention over speed and throughput. Another server, another open-source application. This lead to a desire for monitoring which then necessitated a mail server. The list just grows and grows. It's exciting.

It also gives those of us who have been forced to follow the industry best-practice of moving away from holistic datacenter maintenance into more specialized fields the opportunity to keep our ancillary skills honed; I was able to leverage a newfound skillset during our latest disaster recovery exercise, greatly increasing its success - a wonderful feeling when professional growth positively manifests as a benefit to the entire team. I've since added my old UltraSPARC, Itanium, and MIPS boxes into the mix (if anyone has a spare pizzabox PA-RISC or SPARC sun4c/m hit me up!) as these systems are often still supported in datacenters as legacy systems.

There is an unstated satisfaction which comes from utilizing the fruits of one's labors in hopes of illustrating value to management, and while having the speed and flexibility to quickly answer those, "What if..." questions no matter the form they may take - right at your fingertips - there is always room for improvement, and I'm excited to see where each iteration leads.

Dreamed I had to work from the office - like, drive into the plant and work from my old desk. My computer was still there - an ancient Sun Ultra 5 churning away. I couldn't quite remember all the shortcuts on it I'd created over the years. And it was dark in the compute center; the lights were down low and everything was hushed. Over in the Engineering section they were playing video games with these wired helmets which lit up over certain parts of your head depending on what was happening on screen and tracking the areas of the brain for warfighter support.

I turned to my coworker who wasn't quite my coworker. She had been replaced with someone who looked similar to my old coworker, but I didn't know her. She was working on her brand-new Sun workstation. That's what I get for working from home the last 10 years. When she left her desk I sauntered over to have a look. Appalled and amazed I discovered it was indeed a shiny new Sun setup; bright cream with purple highlights, but it was a thin-client? Connected to her old Sun Ultra 10? Wow.

Of course now I'm in uniform. Another National Defense issue which requires all-hands on deck. An old AF co-worker comes over to taunt me. She has a cup of coffee in her hand and sits down adjacent me, mock-berating me for a litany of perceived injustices. I excuse myself and head to the water fountain. When I return she's watching a video on my computer of myself and a contractor buddy after a night of drinking. There, I am, asleep in the corner, but the girl he is with takes her top off. OMG THIS IS MY WORK COMPUTER HOW DID THAT GET ON HERE?

Then I'm back in sunny Ellinwood tying to replace the dozen or so HVAC filters to lower my electric bill, and of course the Ex shows up to help.

Suse Linux Enterprise Server 12 moved from sysvinit to systemd bringing many changes with it, one of them being wicked replacing ifup for networking, and the new deamon watchdog, nanny. So far so good, but today we had an issue with NFS mounts in the fstab causing `job wickedd-nanny.service/start deleted to break ordering cycle.` I implore you, use caution when searching google for, WICKED NANNY :O :O :O :O

My alarm woke me at 0855, and five minutes later I was dialed into two conference calls, and logged into work with a piping hot mug of black coffee. Emails, more meetings, unix, change requests, and I was done. I opened the garage door, powered on the subwoofer and turned on my Engima mix while removing two of the four door panels of TURDUCKEN and pulling out the speakers. Then I completed my research on car stereos (settled on the Sony MEXXB100BT with a built-in amp), edited some portraits from this past weekend's shoot, and ordered the Mother's day gifts for the kids (they wanted to present her with their portraits which I had mounted - his and hers). I revamped my pending Harry Potter mix and listened once again to my yet-to-be-released Terminator mix. At some point I managed a healthy breakfast, lunch, and dinner, played Minecraft with my daughter, and Wizard101 with my girlfriend.

Bet I sleep good tonight.

Some mornings I spring from bed as the birth of Athena, bursting forth in full armor from Zeus' split skull. Other mornings, not so much.

On the good mornings, I've just pulled back in after an hour-long brisk morning ride on my bike in time to dial-in to my morning call. On the not good mornings, my phone alarms five minutes before I have to dial into said call at 0900; dragging my slow-moving carcass to the Keriug to wait the 30-seconds for a full cup of piping hot STFU.

But this past Friday morning! I got a call from the "Remote Resolution Center."
"Who?"
"The Remote Resolution Center."
"Sorry, I've never heard of you."
"The Help Desk?"
"Oh! LOLOLOL, What did you call yourself?"
"The Remote Resolution Center?"
"Yeah! LOLOLOL, that's hysterical, what did you guys need?"
"You opened a trouble ticket with the help desk. Is now a good time? Are you in front of your computer?"

Now usually I get woken if I'm on call, if there's an emergency, or if no one else will answer their phone. But what I don't get called for at (I remember squinting at the clock at my bedside table) 0655 in the morning, is for non-emergency tickets I have opened for benign laptop issues. "NO I'M NOT AT MY COMPUTER - DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?"

That's when I hear the dreaded word. "Policy." Work has recently updated their policy to call users who have opened tickets by 0700 in the morning, and its, "almost 0700 your time" the help desk agent tells me.

Later that day I open one more ticket:

Please place a note in my file to never call me before 0900 on a non-emergency ticket. Ever.

Initially dismayed that corporate moved from the iPhone to the Android - citing cost - I figured I'd jump into the whole experience with an open-mind because of the fabulous display the Moto X has compared to the 4S, and the adulation of an entire generation of Android users. Plus, you know, Google, FFS. The same people who brought us...Google.

Anyway, after a couple of weeks of understanding how to do things - check Lotus Notes and personal email side-by-side, accept meeting invitations, set alarms in calendar, import contacts, I concluded why droid devices are so much less expensive than their iPhone counterparts:

They suck.

I have grown so very accustomed to having backlit keyboards and laptops, I struggle when I disconnect my work laptop from its perfectly crafted workspace and attempt to work in otherwise darkened places. But no longer! New work laptop is backlit :)

Crystal method playing loudly on my desktop (WHERE SIZE MATTERS) and the windows wide open. I've only had the A/C on two days this year and it is unseasonably cold out today - I am in a sweatshirt enjoying the natural (and free) air.

The openSUSE VBox guest running on my 8x32 Win7 host experiences horrendous wait times despite being on a separate platter and my 8x24 openSUSE server (which I recently installed LXDE on in hopes of replacing the VBox guest) cannot seemingly run NX as a virtual display. If I knew what I was doing, that would no doubt assist in troubleshooting.

And I await my Droid - an O/S I am unfamiliar with. My company decided Apple iPhones are too pricey, so my "upgrade" was an Android. Although, since iOS 8.3, which has surprisingly fixed the slowness issue on my 4S, I am now dubious as to the Droid's effectiveness in my life. That said, its amusing (and sad) how the Robbers-Cave experiment is yet again applicable as otherwise sane (or perhaps not given the evidence) people "choose sides" over the two rival phones - and I'm not talking just preference, but the God-given triumphant jubilation that their phone is the right phone, and the other phone is for fools, stupid people, and worshipers of Satan. In the parlance of our time (thanks Maude), smdh.

"Please [cut and paste the four words] into the attached spreadsheet and send it back to me."

Uh, no.

A couple of months ago, after the weather turned cooler, I began exercising again in earnest. Was working my way up to biking when the troubles began at work, resulting in five weeks of days, nights, weekends, and overnights. When you're working those types of hours, maintaining any sleep/exercise/eating habits absolutely suffer as they're all tied into each other in a frustratingly symbiotic way.

But wrestle that beast to the ground we did, and today was the first day back on my bike since June.

It was empowering.

We had a virus outbreak affecting Windows NT machines in the early 2000s and every box needed to be touched in order to mitigate. drax0r and I were volunteered to assist as they needed everyone they could press into service. We were told to report to a large conference room.

There was a line out the door filled with IT folks from all walks of life, employees and contractors, unix and windows. The line was moving pretty quickly, in one door and out the other. As we got closer, peering in, the place was abuzz with activity - there were personages manning the whiteboard, a bank of manned phones which had been moved in and installed, and four people sitting behind four laptops, each marked with a hallway designation. We approached, signed in, were given a list of machine names and a map, a highlighter, and a phone number to call if we ran into any problems, then shuffled out the far door.

We touched 5000 boxes in a week.

And sometimes mitigation is like a roomful of howler monkeys with IBS.

I'm apparently no longer a Computer Scientist. My new title is, "Senior Professional: System Administrator."

I guess we disagree on what, "urgent" means at work, and what is important.

About twice a year I log in and endorse those in my circles.

Interesting title I gave this entry prior to looking up the post in which I'd been put on a norepinephrine-dopamine reuptake inhibitor; Calm Focus. Yeah, not so much as it turns out, though it has taken me three months to figure all this out (when you rarely interact with anyone at the Self-Actualized level, these things tend to happen). Spending a long overnight with drax0r in East Texas was the exception, but after an uncharacteristically confusing couple of weeks at work (wondering just what the hell was wrong with me that I couldn't figure anything out and feeling extraordinarily dispensable) I finally put all the pieces together - it had to be the dopamine!

The tricky part will be to get my doctor thinking about brain chemistry, as I do not wish to cease my current medication at this time. Its doing what I need it to do insofar as keeping me calm. Now I just need something to focus me. From my limited understanding of these things, that's what dopamine usually does. So I'll leave it to the medical profession to figure out, and as promised, will keep you guys appraised.

Hopefully before I'm fired for being useless.

Hysterical (and unabashedly accurate) article in Lifehack, "15 Things That Introverts Would Never Tell You" but perhaps more importantly, why. We are outgoing, gregarious chameleons - which is why this list is so funny - ITS GIVING OUR SECRETS AWAY! Much like this tech support cheat sheet did when it was first released - I had it hanging outside my cube wall in hopes it would prevent people from asking me questions (it didn't).

• We don’t care about your birthday.
  
  • Any introvert who works in an office knows how it feels to be hustled for birthday cake money. It makes us squirm when a random office person cheerily volunteers that it happens to be their birthday. We think they expect us to respond with like enthusiasm and interest...
    


• We are not really listening as you recount your weekend.
  
  • Unless you are part of our circle of friends, we don’t care what you did last weekend. We are of the mind that everyone has a right to privacy, and if you chose to spend it in a drunken stupor or beating down the door of your ex, then that is up to you. We don’t judge, and find it takes too much energy to give it to people we don’t know. Just because we work with you, that doesn't mean we know you.
    


• We know how to get stuff done.
  
  • We pack our alone time with activities–projects, phone calls, emails, rough drafts and blueprints for world takeover of our next big idea (which we have lots of). We value solitude because it lets us experiment with new concepts, plan and stretch our imagination. Anything is possible when we spend time alone, and what we create may change our lives, and yours, too.
    


• We like to write things out.
  
  • We love email because it helps us get what we need without interruptions. Interruptions throw us off course, and we need to expend more energy to get back on track. So, please don’t call unless it is a close-ended question.
    

See that last one there? Yeah. I am notorious at work for disliking phone calls. "Eric hates phone calls!" I've heard them say. I've tried to explain it to people unsuccessfully. I even had someone tell me, "But Eric, I don't like to type." Ironic given what we do for a living.

There are certain activities which absolutely must take place in order to not live in squalor, all of which I was planning on tackling this weekend. Instead, I spent two days and two nights either shivering in my bed, or burning up. Decidedly NOT fun. I can't remember the last time I was racked with fever, but damn. I started re-integrating solid food sometime late Sunday.

Outside of cleaning, the only other thing I was looking forward to was biking - the entire weekend was sunny and gorgeous - well, at least the few times I stumbled out of my sick-cave to turn the furnace on full blast or stumbled back to turn it off and lay under the ceiling fan.

Thankfully, 72-hours seemed to be the runtime of this particular bout - I should know for sure Monday morning - surprise relapses are a surprise! I always appreciate not being sick on work days, but now it feels like I didn't get a day off :(

And the substitute bus driver failed to pick up my daughter and the school's transportation coordinator couldn't raise her on the radio.

I'm going in, Chief.

"What could go wrong?" I asked. What an enormous pain in my ass that was.

BEFORE	AFTER
Ubuntu 10.04 -->	openSUSE 31.1
(2.6.32)	(3.11.10)
Apache 2.2.14 -->	Apache 2.4.6
MySQL 5.1.7 -->	MariaDB 5.5.33
PHP 5.3.2 -->	PHP 5.4.20
SMF 2.0 RC1 -->	SMF 2.0.7

This conversion did not complete without its challenges, but the reason I'm documenting it here boils down to the one thing which made all of this like, not work the first five times:

PHP 5.4.20 is configured to use sha256 which results in session IDs being 64 characters long. SMF 2.0.7 doesn't support session IDs longer than 32 characters, so when SMF goes to check the one from PHP with what's in the database, they won't match.

Either edit php.ini and replace [session.hash_function = sha256] with [session.hash_function = 0] to cause PHP to default to md5 for session IDs (resulting in standard 32-character session IDs), or alter the following tables in the database:

ALTER TABLE smf_log_errors CHANGE session session char(64) NOT NULL;
ALTER TABLE smf_log_online CHANGE session session char(64) NOT NULL;
ALTER TABLE smf_sessions CHANGE session_id session_id char(64) NOT NULL;

I've got to hand it to the hardcore support volunteers over at http://simplemachines.org who seriously know their code, despite the answer almost never being easy to find.

Additionally, saving uncompressed flat files (*.sql) rather than compressed files prior to importing them elsewhere seemed to add junk in the file header () visible in vi but not Notepad; exporting to a compressed file then importing solved that, and so did naming the exported file the same name as the database, which needs to be created prior to importation.

I ended up creating a virtual machine locally in which to perform all the upgrades and manipulate the data for testing purposes prior to exporting to the new server. It took me far longer than I expected.