Cass - Day 1

I arrived in New Mexico at 1500 on Thursday, unloaded the car, picked up Kaylie, drove to AirBNB, then took Kaylie to Occupational Therapy while Cass worked late. After Occupational Therapy, took the girls to Chill Zone where I visited with Cyra for a couple of hours before Cass showed, then we picked up Schlotzsky's on the way home for dinner. As is our usual, Cass and I split one.

I passed out clothes and games to the girls then sat on the back porch sipping decaf while Cass and I talked - the entire reason I came. I only had one remaining question on my list for our "face-to-face" and it was this:

How does being a hopeless romantic manifest itself inside you?

She brought me her scrapbook, and granted me access into that part of her life. I was surprised to see so many of the things we've discussed ad nasueum within its pages, as well as stoic ideals and quotes hidden within. I likened it to a multimedia Shot of Serotonin.

I told her I didn't know what had changed within me the last couple of weeks, but that my logic and emotions were no longer warring, and that I was at peace. To put in in words which walked back what I'd previously said, if she rejected me today, I would no longer require distancing myself from her or the kids to break the emotional connection, and would in fact like to stay the month regardless, if she'd have me. I've often mentioned that being her friend was far more important to me than being her lover, and I believe I'm at the place where my actions could prove that to her.

Obviously our relationship would change - as it should - and we lamented that our future potential partners would likely disallow the closeness we share as friends. That out of the way, she fully intends to date me to see where things lead, which places me squarely on Cloud Nine ™

2024 - Sixteenth Session

Got a, "thumbs up" from Tess over Telehealth this morning when she found out I was in New Mexico. This resulted in the majority of the session reminding me to not only remain focused on the present, but to also remind Cass often to do the same. Funny enough, we've been reminding each other constantly during our conversations. I was also pleased last night when Cass quoted Tess, saying, "She said we owe it to ourself to give a chance else we'll never know what could have been." Or something to that effect :D