Cub Scouts

[ehowton]

Took my boy to his Cub Scouts meeting. What a complete nightmare. Myself and two other dads were there to watch their 2nd graders learn teamwork and cohesiveness. Instead, we witnessed a living nightmare.

Let me start out to say that I'm not a very laid-back person. I've always wanted to be, its what I strive for. But that's just not me. I'm what one might call, driven. I set goals, I work hard, I sacrifice personal pleasures for the end-game. Oh, I used to be laid back. My wife asked me about that once. She said, "Remember when you were laid back and not stressed out all the time?" My reply? "Remember when I drank a keg of beer a week?" Either way, I like order. And that first Cub Scout meeting was anything but.

Also, having been in the military, I must view personal appearance in a uniform differently than others. There were people there that looked like a soup sandwich. They're called irons, people, and they help make you look less like 10-pounds of shit stuffed in a 5-pound bag. And I'm talking Scout Leaders, not the kids!

Too critical, I know. We'll see how he progresses over time, and with my gentle guidance of paying attention to the leader dude.

---

Cigar Update:
drax0r and I smoked a couple of those magnificent Dominican Montecristo's celtmanx had given me for my birthday. They were fantastic; perfect in every way. Moist, flavorful, easy to draw - C'est Manifique! And of course drax0r and I finally got around to smoking the DaVinci's that schpydurx graciously donated to the cause. It was a 70's day, we'd both left work early to attend a city meeting and we arrived an hour early to smoke our cigars. First of all, though a Nicaraguan product, it was very full bodied with a medium taste. Reminded me of the Hondurans I used to so enjoy. Anyway, allow at least an hour for this cigar, and prepare for a buzz. Thanks dude.

---

Moron Update:
If you and I have an active text-messaging session going on, don't call me. The reason we have an active text-messaging session going on is because I'm unable to talk on the phone. Thank you.

Comments

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

Dads who don't know how to iron their own clothes? You know how you are alwasys slamming Alabama? Sounds like you're the one living in the unkempt wilderness called the sticks.

Remember when I drank a keg of beer a week?
You mean you drinking two kegs a week now? You've got to get ahold of yourself.

Cigars
Glad you had fun. Yes, you will have to allow some time for the DaVinci but it's well worth it. And the buzz is what it's all about.

Moron Update
Do you have anyone in mind you wish to name?

I think you must have read a John Dvork column before posting.

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Moron Update

I guessed you right off the bat!

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

Your midichlorian count is impressively high!

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Ah! Give me something hard. :)

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

Thanks for thinking of me.

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Anytime I read the word Moron!

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

Hard love is better then no love at all.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

Dads who don't know how to iron their own clothes?
Once again sir, you've missed the point completely. Because I was ex-military, my standards are higher than others.

You mean you drinking two kegs a week now?
No.

And the buzz is what it's all about.
I'm sorry that's why you smoke cigars. Its not why I smoke them. Furthermore, I haven't gotten a buzz off a cigar since I started dipping back in 1996. I'm guessing the reason I got a buzz this time was because I haven't had any tobacco for a full month, coupled with the fact those Da Vinci's were so full bodied. Again, excellent choice, and thank you.

Everybody on my friends list has pulled this stunt at least once. Your attempt today brought it to mind, but no sir, you are not alone.

I think you must have read a John Dvork column before posting.
I don't know who that is.

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

Once again sir, you've missed the point completely. Because I was ex-military, my standards are higher than others.
So you're saying that everyone else's standards are to wear un-ironed clothes? You are and arrogant, egotisical bastard.

No.
Not even with your coerce the voters campaign?

I'm sorry that's why you smoke cigars.
I don't, I enjoy the taste, but I smoke so infrequently that I wind up with a buzz.

Everybody on my friends list has pulled this stunt at least once. Your attempt today brought it to mind, but no sir, you are not alone.
So all your friends are morons?

I don't know who that is.
Do you know anything? Sheesh! John Dvoark

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

So you're saying that everyone else's standards are to wear un-ironed clothes?
You're like a child. You only hear half of what I say. But concerning the wearing of a uniform, yes.

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

Moron Update
Don't send me a fucking text message if I'm sitting in front of AIM.

Thank you for your patience concerning this issue.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

Don't be fucking retarded. If you're in front of an AIM session, and I'm somewhere I can't talk, I'll fucking text message you.

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

fuck you.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

Excellent! We now understand each other.

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

How did G man enjoy the Cub Scout meeting?

Maybe if the leader dude doesn't work out you can take over as troop leader.
That would be awesome!

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

But then he would be accussed of taking over Cub Scouts on his rise to power. We wouldn't want to give stalker lady another bone to pick, now would we?

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

He had fun because it mostly playing. I'll tell you this, if I were Scout Leader, not only would my uniform be squared away, I'd be just like Arnold in Kindergarten Cop.

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

LOL!!!!! I can picture you as the Arnold character now!

[leonardii.livejournal.com]

I agree. If you are going to where a uniform. Wear it with pride - and make sure you iron it to make it look like you are wearing it with pride.

Nothing sadder than a shoddy looking boy or man in a shoddy uniform.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

You and I sir, are cut from the same cloth.

[leonardii.livejournal.com]

We're much more than that, my dear friend.

Friends who inspire each other, the encouragement we reciprocate, and the wit and humor we share, and most importantly - the trust and fellowship we truly have cannot be put into words.

You are closer to me than my own brother. I love him, of course. But we've become so estranged because of - well just so many reasons.

Having you in my life means more to me than some of my own blood ties.

Who knows - when our children get older... maybe one of these days we might become true family. ;)

As the father myself, thinking of you - I cannot think of a better man with a son whom I would love to see grow into a man. To see the reflection of what you can give him.

Yes dear friend - like the finer things of quality, our friendship with age will become like the finest cognac, the finest bottle of wine, and the best of all things in manhood, brotherhood, and the true best of what friends can be.

Yes - I believe this most sincerely.

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

You can be a real pain in the ass sometimes.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

Its a gift...and a curse.

[irulan-amy.livejournal.com]

Rockin icon!

[photogoot.livejournal.com]

What is it that qualifies a man to be a cub scout leader? Oh thats right, a beating heart! Keep your eye on that dude. I don't trust any man in a wrinkly uniform, never have never will!

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

I have this to say concerning my son's instructor. He was the most sharply dressed one there. I had no complaints of his uniform. Furthermore, I had memorized where to place patches as I did my son's. His was the only one which was correct. The rest...I dunno dude, they'd have been dressed down pretty hard by the 1st Sergeant.

[irulan-amy.livejournal.com]

One should always follow "the leader dude," it's sage advice.

I've never been good at being laidback. I try..but it's just not me.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Long live the leader dude!