Beltway Blues

[ehowton]

Four hours of sleep. 20 minutes of waiting for the 'next shuttle' which did not immediately arrive, and about 30 very long seconds (fully one half a minute you understand) of a gentleman who had just boarded not remembering which bag was his when it was time to disembark approximately 5 minutes later.

These delays caused me to miss my flight. Surprise, surprise. My mother would have told me, "Make sure you allow plenty of time," or something to that effect. I myself have been known to dole out that same advice to others. Other usually younger, less motivated and generally more slovenly in their appearance than I. But I digress.

My time is very valuable. My bill rate is astronomical. How I spend my personal time is even more important to me, because of my children. How much "time" am I supposed to "allow" for reaching my destination in a timely manner? How can one account for every cud-chewing meatbag with a 5-minute thought retention issue? Incalculable.

Needless to say, I was very angry that I missed my flight. After all, I didn't allow myself enough time. Next flight was two and a half hours later, and full. As it was my only option, I booked stand-by and stood in the cattle pens, awaiting the proverbial slaughter via TSA Security Checkpoint inefficiency. Yes, I laced my toothpaste with a liquid explosive I'll mix-up in the lavatory sink and detonate with the fuse in the heel of my boot. Praise be Allah. They should reinstate racial profiling instead of jacking up WWII vets who have metal pins in their hips. Grrrrr.

At any rate, I mosey to my gate and follow some random guy to the desk. He asks if he can still get on the plane. Turns out, it was so empty, they almost canceled the flight but the door was already closed and if you've already checked baggage, it would show up on the later plane. I interrupted, handed her my boarding pass, while she called the plane. "RUN!" she yells at me. I did. They opened the door and I made my flight. That was the easy part. The hard part was navigating the ever-changing roads and exit in downtown straight out of a bad horror movie where the house/maze garden/tunnels supernaturally modify their walls/hedges/routes.

Eventually though, everything worked out, and our first day was a rousing success.

Comments

[bsdcat.livejournal.com]

They should reinstate racial profiling instead of jacking up WWII vets who have metal pins in their hips.

Is there a "c) none of the above" option?

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

No, I think the muslim terrorists took away our other options (freedoms).

[bsdcat.livejournal.com]

But Timothy McVeigh did not?

The millions of muslim citizens who are not terrorists have no say in this? Bullshit.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

1) In 1968, who assassinated Robert Kennedy?
a) Abbe Hoffman
b) Tiny Tim
c) The Chicago Seven
d) A Muslim male extremist between the age of 17 and 40

2) In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were kidnapped and massacred by:
a) Olga Corbutt
b) Sitting Bull
c) Arnold Schwartzeneger
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

3) In 1979,the U.S. embassy in Iran was taken over by:
a) Lost Norwegians
b) Elvis
c) A tour bus full of 80-year-old women
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

4) During the 1980's, a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by:
a) John Dillinger
b) The King of Sweden
c) The Boy Scouts
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

5) In 1983, the U.S. Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by:
a) A Domino's pizza delivery boy
b) Pee Wee Herman
c) Geraldo Rivera making up for a slow news day
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

6) In 1985, the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70 year old American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard by:
a) The Smurfs
b) Davy Jones
c) The Little Mermaid
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

7) In 1985, TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens and a U.S. Navy diver was murdered by:
a) George Washington
b) Benedict Arnold
c) Gold Selleck Silliman
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

8) When a train was detonated in Spain, who was responsible?
a) Captain Kidd
b) Charles Lindberg
c) Mother Teresa
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

9) In 1993, the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by:
a) Richard Simmons
b) Grandma Moses
c) Michael Jordan
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

10) In 1998, the U.S. embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by:
a) Mr. Rogers
b) Hillary, to distract attention from Wild Bill's women problems
c) The World Wrestling Federation to promote its next villain: "Mustapha"
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

11) In 1999, The USS Cole was attacked and more than 15 American Sailors were killed by:
a) David Letterman
b) Shaquille O'Neil
c) The Cookie Monster
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

12) On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked and and thousands of people were killed by:
a) Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck, and Elmer Fudd
b) The Supreme Court of Florida
c) Mr. Bean
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

13) In 2002, the United States fought a war in Afghanistan against:
a) Enron
b) The Lutheran Church
c) The NFL
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

14) In 2002 reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by:
a) Bonny and Clyde
b) Captain Kangaroo
c) Billy Graham
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

15) In 2001, Philippine Missionaries Gracia and Martin Burnham were kidnapped, held for over a year, and Martin subsequently killed by:
a) Mr. Rogers
b) Scooby Doo & Shaggy
c) Ronald Reagan
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

16) On July 4th 2002, two Innocent airline passengers were killed, and three others Injured at the ticket counter of El Al Airlines in the LAX International terminal by:
a) Hulk Hogan after losing the WWF Title
b) The cast of Monty Python
c) Senator Lil' Tommy Daschle
d) A Muslim male extremist between the age of 17 and 40

17) On July 31, 2002, five Americans were killed by a Palestinian HAMAS bomber in Jerusalem while attending school by:
a) The US Congress
b) The tooth fairy
c) The Easter bunny
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

18) On October 12th 2002 more than 200 innocent civilians (including 200 Australians and 5 Americans) were brutally murdered in Bali by:
a) Kermit the Frog & Miss Piggy
b) Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street
c) Charles Barkley
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

19) On October 29th 2002 more than 700 Moscow theatre goers were taken hostage and threatened with execution by:
a) Royal Canadian Mounted Police
b) Laurie Dhue of Fox News Channel
c) Peter Jennings of ABC News, pissed because Fox News is kicking his ass
d) Muslim male extremists between the age of 17 and 40

[bsdcat.livejournal.com]

Perhaps a complete list, and not one edited to lead to a particular conclusion, would be more useful.

Or, perhaps a discussion of profiling from someone with a good working knowledge of security?

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

Oh, Oh, I'll answer that quiz!!!

The answer is (D) to all of the questions!!!

I like a man who knows history!!!

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

I knew this was coming.

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

When The Oklahoma bombing happened I was fresh out of college with my four hours of Middle Eastern History. I was praised by my co-worker Mohammad Mohammad for being an intellectual because before they caught McVeigh everyone at our office and else where thought that Muslims had done it, I on the other hand did not.

I was younger then and after more study I have found that our country, our Western way of life, and our freedom our under attack from the Muslim Arabs and Persians (Iranians) and have been for over a thousand years. Lebanon was once the jewel of the middle east. It was the most modern and prosperous country in the Middle East but the neighboring Muslim countries conspired to destroy by instigating the Muslim population to overthrow the government because the majority of the population was Christian.

Yugoslavia is yet another example. For thousand years it has been the gateway for the Muslim invasions of Europe and that is what has caused so much strife in the countries that now make up that part of Eastern Europe.

And what ever happened to Constantinople Greece? Oh, I know it became Istanbul. What happened to the original Christians that lived there? There were murdered and driven out by the Muslims.

The same thing happened to Greek "Christian" Egypt. Did you think the Greek Pharaohs just up in left on their own.
The strife in most African nations today is caused by Muslims ethnically cleansing Christians!

I still give individual Muslims the benefit of the doubt and treat them with respect as I wish to be treated but Muslims as a whole group I do not. Do you really believe all the money their mosque's send back to the Middle East is for peaceful purposes? I pray sir that you will read some world history books and look at what is happening around the world! Maybe you should watch Black Hawk Down and see where we were spat on for trying to help starving Muslims. Where was all the money from the mosque's going then?

[bsdcat.livejournal.com]

I did not intend to initiate this a discussion, and I had no idea that saying I would prefer to not have racial profiling would bring it up.

I am sorry I egged you and ehowton on at all; I am stopping right now.

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

If wolves are attacking you and yours and then hiding among peaceful traveling dogs sometimes you need profiling in order to separate the wolves from the dogs.

Yes, you should never tangle with your learned elders!!!

[bsdcat.livejournal.com]

Quite the opposite. I find yourself and ehowton so blind on this issue that I would prefer to maintain superficial cordiality, rather than delve deeply and honestly into the issue.

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

"Then Muhammad made what, to the pagan Meccans, was a still more improbable claim. Following a Quranic revelation, he said that he journeyed in one night upon a winged horse, first to Jerusalem, then up through the seven levels of Heaven, where he saw the celestial Ka'bah and received from God the fundamentals of the Islamic creed, and that he had talked to Moses during his return to earth. The pagans mocked Muhammad's claims, although the Quran confirmed them, and they quoted his wife's admission that he had spent that whole night sleeping in bed." (page 33-34, A Concise History of the Middle East, 3rd ed. by Arthur Goldschmidt, Jr.)

Gosh, Jesus never had to take a flying carpet from Medina to Jerusalem and take a stairway to heaven from the Temple Mount to talk to Moses and Abraham.

"If Muhammad was ever to lead Medina's Jews and ansar, the emigrants would have to find ways to support themselves. The immediate answer was to raid the Meccan caravans." (page 35, A Concise History of the Middle East, 3rd ed. by Arthur Goldschmidt, Jr.)

Gosh, Jesus never had to spread his word by robbing and killing people by the sword.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

I have my own opinions, yes, but I am not impervious to new ideas or new ways of thinking; in fact, while I don't consider myself ignorant of most issues, my knowledge is usually based on my own experiences. I do not surround myself solely with people I only agree with, and you and I rarely see eye-to-eye which is why I always enjoy your perspective. I learn from you. I am a better person because of you. While ultimately I may choose to disagree with you, you force me to challenge my own views, and I am wiser because of it. Usually, though, you provide food for thought and allow me to assimilate your opinion and ideas into my own. For that, I am grateful.

While I respect your candor in maintaining a superficial cordiality, I would prefer to delve more deeply and honestly into the issues, if for nothing more than to better understand others around me with a different viewpoint, and unearth my own limited understanding. Perhaps this isn't the forum for that, however.

Granted this is rarely an easy process, and time consuming, but to write me off as "blind" because of so few comments concerning this matter would be premature. As an ever changing being, I have come to question quite a few things I have held dear to me this last decade, and will likely do so the rest of my life. While I am by no means a hate-monger, nor racist, I've come to learn that diversity, tolerance, and stereotypes are typically not what I was taught they are, and in this day and age, I find myself standing alone in finding people willing to discuss the hard questions.

[bsdcat.livejournal.com]

Granted this is rarely an easy process, and time consuming, but to write me off as "blind" because of so few comments concerning this matter would be premature.

No, it's not an easy process. I am overloaded with trying to engage in this process with you and other people. I am simply not able to do it. Maybe some other time.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

I would gladly take the place of each and every elderly person I see pulled to the side with their shoes & belts in their hand waiting to be scanned. I find that disgraceful.

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

I would like a c) option provided that it does not come at a greater loss of freedom or a more insecure nation.

However, (Hezbollah and Lebanon come to mind) when you have a group of terrorist who hid behind civilians (read women and children) and launch their attacks of fear, how is there to not be collateral damage? The only way to remove the threat of terrorism is to take the terrorists out. While I fully support taking whatever steps are necessary to avoid the death of innocent women and children, it just doesn't add up to go from house to house (i.e. Iraq) according terrorist American rights (i.e. innocent until proven guilty).

Only the Nation with the most freedoms, compassion, intellectual properties (i.e. most technologically advanced) and determination to not see innocents suffer would attempt such an unthinkable method of warfare...and (to a greater or lesser extent) be successful at this lofty goal. But before one goes out on a limb and criticizes This Country for not achieving said lofty goal immediately, one might start closer to home.

If there is a group of people that are statically most often responsible for acts of terrorism, it would behoove said Country to investigate said group of people first. Should some crazy Right-winged Christian Fundamentalist also commit an act of terror, he too should receive swift justice.

If one person of one particular group commits one act of terror it does not follow that everyone in that group is prone to terrorist nor that said group will now suddenly provide more terrorists. The converse is also true. If there is a group of people who continually commit acts of terror on a global scale involving millions of people, that group of people should be targeted more readily in an effort to stop the terrorism before it starts, not clean up the mess it makes.

NOTE: Italics in this comment were used for emphasis, not to show quotation

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

It's ironic that the guy who asked the deepest question gets ignored, but when it comes to the touchy-feely issues such as racial profiling, everyone gets their dander up forcing their panties to become wadded.

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

"Other usually younger, less motivated and generally more slovenly in their appearance than I."

You should not talk about drax0r like that, even though it's true.

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

I'm surprised you choose drax0r to be the butt of your joke.

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

Oh, I didn't ehowton did, I just named names!!!!

[schpydurx.livejournal.com]

um...ok.

[celtmanx.livejournal.com]

Sorry about your flight mishap, glad the rest of the day was a success!!!

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

I'm going to sleep. Tomorrow will be a better day.

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you made it there safely! Sorry it was such a pain though.

Have fun visiting with photogoot! Tell him I said 'Hi' and we hope to see him down here soon! :)

Hope you managed to get your liquid explosive toothpaste past the checkpoints!!! hehe

Can't wait to have you back at work on Monday! Miss you!

[photogoot.livejournal.com]

He is getting me drunk in his hotel room! I am afraid....

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

That's right. Just relax...

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Be askared - be very askared!

[photogoot.livejournal.com]

I am less afraid now 'cause we have ice...

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

In the ghetto?

[photogoot.livejournal.com]

About an hour ago we literally watched a drug deal go down on the street directly below us. We are one the fifth floor. we were not scared. I don't want alarm you but Eric is now doing a speeddball.

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Don't you mean an eight ball? And have you seen any rats yet?

[photogoot.livejournal.com]

Oh yea! you're right. No rats yet I think... There bigger than the cats here, and thats no fib!

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Maybe they are cats...with male pattern baldness on their tails.
That's what Andruid would try to convince you of anyway.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

In the part of town they put me up in, I'd rather have my knife!

I enjoyed talking to you today and I too am looking forward to Monday!

Tchuss!

[galinda822.livejournal.com]

Don't even think about me working all those looooong hours while you're away enjoying yourself.

Just don't expect me to look my best on Monday morning. ;)

[snapper521.livejournal.com]

I like your site as green not orange/brown Eric. :-P

You should try blue.

[ehowton.livejournal.com]

The green was representative of a VT100 console terminal. The only other color that ever came in was amber. It was only a test, and I'll be going back to green shortly. Thanks!

[snapper521.livejournal.com]

kk. :-)

Just thought I'd opinionate you. :-D