I FACEBOOKED YOUR MOM

There's this guy at work, we'll call him "Bob." I make fun of Bob mercilessly because its so darn easy, and he's so good natured. "Bob" invited me to to join his network on one of those viral social networking groups (you know the ones, where every asshole you've ever known can 'add' you whether you've spoken to them in 20-years or not).

Ok, so I have an account on nearly all them - they all point here, to my livejournal. Not effectively, mind you, but still. So anyway, just like I do with all the other god-forsaken alerts I seem to get, I deleted it. Well guess who drags his forlorn ass into work with the long face thinking maybe I didn't like him? That's right, "Bob."

There's now a list on my whiteboard at work with a LIST OF THINGS I DON'T RESPOND TO:

• Facebook


• Classmates


• Plaxo


• Linkd-In


• Twitter

Plaxo actually found me a job last month and emailed me a very exciting email. Taco Bell Assistant Manager. Yeah. Well done, Plaxo. Go fuck yourself. I also have something like 1700 requests alone to play eff'ing poker with so-and-so on Facebook. Hell, photogoot's ex-wife sent me an email last week asking me why I hadn't accepted her request six months ago. I simply cannot seem to give a rat's ass about every minute move or which asinine game you people think is cool. Its just overwhelming.

High school. Let's see. Anyone I want to talk to from high school? Um...no. I don't even know these people anymore!

I stopped cross-posting to xanga when they added a checkbox to automatically log in and cross post to Facebook. The problem? YOU HAVE TO MANUALLY UNCHECK IT EACH TIME. Screw that. Xanga doesn't even have threaded comments. They're dead to me.

I ask, is there something wrong with me, or the rest of the world?