Interestingly enough, I was having a similar conversation with a coworker - not about modeling proper behavior for children, but about always behaving well yourself. I was interested in her viewpoint, which surprisingly matched my own.
Why surprisingly?
Well, I am rather laid back, so I don't have near as many strong emotions with which to contend. My coworker is a high strung type A, who also has a lot of personal issues with which she is contending (a mother with Alzheimer's and an ill brother for whom she has responsibility). She can't hide her tenseness, which is evident in the way she walks, but no matter, she is always, polite, helpful, kind, and patient. In our conversation, she made it very clear that she often feels frustration and sometimes anger, but she believes it is inappropriate and counter-productive to inflict those emotions on others. And it's not that she is "pretending" not to feel those things and faking it in her interactions with others. It's just that her firm belief in doing the right thing outweighs whatever she may be feeling at the moment - and that becomes the prevailing emotion - the desire to do the right thing.
Having the conversation with her enlightened me about my own thought / emotional processes. It's not that I never feel negative emotions, but treating people well - especially the people I love - is far more important to me than expressing , and inflicting, those negative emotions on others. I would almost say it is a matter of honor and pride.
I will NEVER understand the mentality that believes its okay to inflict your most vile mood on those you love, because they love you and will tolerate it.
no subject
Why surprisingly?
Well, I am rather laid back, so I don't have near as many strong emotions with which to contend. My coworker is a high strung type A, who also has a lot of personal issues with which she is contending (a mother with Alzheimer's and an ill brother for whom she has responsibility). She can't hide her tenseness, which is evident in the way she walks, but no matter, she is always, polite, helpful, kind, and patient. In our conversation, she made it very clear that she often feels frustration and sometimes anger, but she believes it is inappropriate and counter-productive to inflict those emotions on others. And it's not that she is "pretending" not to feel those things and faking it in her interactions with others. It's just that her firm belief in doing the right thing outweighs whatever she may be feeling at the moment - and that becomes the prevailing emotion - the desire to do the right thing.
Having the conversation with her enlightened me about my own thought / emotional processes. It's not that I never feel negative emotions, but treating people well - especially the people I love - is far more important to me than expressing , and inflicting, those negative emotions on others. I would almost say it is a matter of honor and pride.
I will NEVER understand the mentality that believes its okay to inflict your most vile mood on those you love, because they love you and will tolerate it.